Funny Follows Me

Nineteen years ago this morning I had a RNY Gastric Bypass to lose weight. I have written about it on facebook almost every year since it’s my Rebirth date and I think anniversaries should be celebrated for major life changing events including surgeries. Well this one certainly has defined my life. I went from 268 lbs to 160 lbs in 6 months in 2004-2005. Like the stock market my weight has been up and down throughout those years but luckily with the help of Ozempic, I’m managing to stay heart healthy and slim.

This year has been the most difficult since I have had complications that have been life threatening. Every year, I think back on my decision and my last moments before surgery and I ask, “Did I do the right thing and would I ever regret doing this”. I researched it for 2 whole years and found out that Star Jones and Al Roker has both done it so that was good enough for me. I found my first doctor in NJ and after going i just knew the operation was for me but that wasn’t the doctor. Two years later as the weight loss “fad” continued and Carnie Wilson, I decided to leave it up to God. I prayed that if insurance covered it then that would be my sign. Well, insurance said yes and so did I. I found a new doctor who I was confident in and had the luck of having 2 brilliant doctors do my surgery.

It was a comedy of errors that morning and my vein couldn’t be found due to my low lying veins which were always blamed on my “obesity”. So, they told me we have one last option; putting the IV on my jugular vein. At this point I had been through about 6 months of clearance so I said just do it! Nike wasn’t the first to say this. So, they put me on a plank board and turned me upside down to have the blood drain to my head. They got the IV in no problem and all I thought of was pure determination to get this surgery done. The doctors asked me what song to play during surgery and I replied, “The first cut is the deepest” by Sheryl Crow”. They laughed, put me out and I woke up hours later reborn with a 2 oz stomach and hope for my future.

I hated being called “FAT” and to me that word is a bullet word – it hits you so hard; you either die from it or you need surgery to mend the pain that your heart and brain felt. It’s like dominos falling; that word can do so much damage and create such deep depression. I never have seen an obituary read, “Died from Fat” but we know Obesity causes a lot of deaths such as Diabetes, Heart Attacks, Strokes etc. Obesity is a disease but in this society we live in it’s a SHAMED disease that people who don’t have it have no idea how hard it is to live with.

I lost108 lbs of fat and in return my friends vanished. The fat funny girl has a lot more friends since they aren’t threatened by her anymore and that’s how my life changed the most. My personality developed stronger and my mouth became like a knife with sarcasm and wit that could cut you. I stand up for myself now and called a Bitch but I never deny that. I walk past crowds of people and never worry, “oh will I be laughed” as I did before. That freedom baby! My journey to self love started 19 years ago today and everyday it keeps growing. My most asked question is, ” Why am I single?”. Well, it’s because I’m working on myself and when ready I will get in a healthy relationship. I think I might start snapping back when asked to the previous question, “Why aren’t you divorced?” ; that just might start a conversation as well as stop that question from every asked.

Yes, life begins at 50 but mine started 19 years ago and I wouldn’t change it for the world. If I live a shorter life span due to my surgery, it was all worth it because I never lived and loved myself until my gastric bypass.

If you know anybody who needs help with weight please feel free to contact me but know that if you suffer from Obesity, your body most likely is Insulin Resistance, which means your pancreas doesn’t secrete enough insulin to burn your food no matter how many steps you take a day. So if you eat a roll, you get a roll on your body. The cure is surgery, and weight loss injectables which do work. People say the surgery is “an easy way out” but I can honestly tell you it’s not. It’s a tool for life and you have to use it to find your best weight.